I only ate like 5 pieces of Halloween candy this year. Sad.

Weird/Borderline creepy video....

But this song makes me want to close my eyes and jam

I love how he waits til the very end to say love. Goosebumps.

I'm just sick of your fundus, okay!

Today I was crazy. If Rob were around he'd snicker and say, "oh just today, huh?" or some derivative thereof. Whatever, Rob.

It was my last day of OB. FAREWELL babies and all you crazy pregnant/barely-not-pregnant freaks! The only thing that got me through the day was knowing that by this time next week I'll be back with all the regular sick old people that I know and love. I'd take bed sores over your stupid hemorrhoids any. day. of. the. week. No more uterus-lochia-fundus-breastfeeding-poop-diaper-medicate-me-I-just-labored-for-ten-hours talk! Done, done with you all! Good luck to you and your screaming babies with their aging diseases and old man faces. And no, just because It has a pink line on Its socks I cannot clearly distinguish It from a boy. Don't be ridiculous.

When the cat's away...

So Rob is in DC for the week, leaving me here to my own devices. I've been engaging in activities such as: eating an entire pan of brownies (check), washing laundry but then just dumping it on the ground and leaving it to be hung up later (check), watching past episodes of Private Practice (check), online shopping (check), turning Pandora up as loud as I can and tearing it up in the living room (check). The funny thing though, is that its not like I can't do those things when Rob is here but I think its subconsciously the closest I can get to throwing a party when the parents (or husband, whatever) are away.

And today's only day one, imagine what crazy shenanigans I'll be getting into by Saturday! I might even leave the cap off the toothpaste!

Thanks, kind citizen

Today someone left a note on my car telling me that my tire was low and to BE CAREFUL! Can't be sad about a stranger helping you out.

Weird. I thought the "E" in ER stood for EMERGENCY

Today I worked triage in the ER (checking people in)

These are my top 5 Chief Complaints (which they fill out on a form and give back to me which makes it was more awesome because to write these words on a page just resonates crazy more than hearing them spoken):

5. To explain (apparently there were not enough lines on the paper to describe this man's many issues)
4. My daughter has a rock in her ear and she won't tell me who did it (If I'm 5 years old, there's no way I'm not selling out the friend who dared me to put a rock in my ear, but then again, loyalty has to count for something right?)
3. I can't breath (related to: yelling about not helping her or taking her seriously, oh and the pot soaked in formaldehyde she smoked earlier)
2. I'm having a nervous breakdown (copy that)
1. I caught my feet on fire (....)



OH. And my most recent theory that the ER contains some sort of magnetic pull for crazies was confirmed today when a patient from the 5th floor wandered into our waiting room and told us she was lost and didn't know how she got there. Coincidence? Hardly.

Day one

First day of work I:

Did my first EKG
Transferred a lady to a body bag
Removed a bunch of stitches from someone's neck
Picked rocks out of severe road rash
Gave an enema

Things are looking up (minus the enema part...I could do without that).