Piggy

When I was young I had my share of some unfortunate medical issues. For about a year of my childhood I was in and out of surgery, frequenting physical therapy, taking medication that is literally no longer prescribed to children (Valium; turns out it has the opposite effect on kids. Thanks, mom and dad for staying up all night with me while I ran up and down stairs), sitting out on recess and gym class, watching out the window while my siblings jumped on the trampoline (dramatic, I know), and crying because I had a half-body cast on two separate occasions (4th graders are mean).

My big brother, Dru bought me a stuffed animal pig a few Christmas' before. I named him Piggy, as I was always the clever one. Piggy, like many stuffed animals for children, became my crutch. I loved him so much. When the year of my hellish medical history arrived, Piggy was the most important thing to me. He  loved all of the same things I did, he was always awake when I was, and even loved watching Star Wars as much AND as frequently as I did. Some nights I would cry and cry because everything hurt so bad and Piggy would cry too.

Looking back, I see how kids become so attached to an inanimate object. Piggy was a security and safety that I just couldn't duplicate. Tonight I was holding Robbie while he fell asleep. He has been struggling most of his life and has had a few weeks recently where it just feels like things are never getting better. He will have a procedure done this upcoming week and be kept in the hospital again. I thought about the surgeries that I had to have when I was young. My mom always brought Piggy to the hospital, and in my 9-year-old brain it felt like since he was there, I'd be okay. I put Robbie down in his crib and rummaged around in his box of toys and animals. At the bottom was Piggy, whom I brought all the way to Texas when I moved, in the hopes that if I had a baby, he would love him too. I put the old, worn animal in the crib to watch over my sweet baby and realized why he was so important to me. Piggy did everything with me. Ate breakfast, watched TV, played, told stories, and every night when I knelt down to pray, Piggy prayed with me. I associate him with innocence, life and surviving painful, hard times. When I think about it, I know that Robbie will have hard times to come, but he will get through them and will come out the other side having had opportunities to grow and be strengthened that were very much individualized for him. Just like we all do. I also know that I won't always be the one who can give him what he needs but he will find comfort in the joys that life has to offer. Maybe even in something as simple as a stuffed animal pig.

??

When someone misspells a word in a status, or especially in a super-aggressive rant, I desperately comb through the comments to see if anyone mentions it. But they never do, because that would be rude. But, can it not be rude? Can we make it, not rude? Isn't it better? If I pronounced something horribly, horribly wrong, isn't it best to tell me? Just put me out of my misery? Doesn't that fall under some sort of ethical responsibility? And can I not be a jerk because of the unwritten rule that if you post something publicly, it's open to scrutiny? That's a thing, right?

Chief Complaint: It's hard to use my words

Me: What brings you to the Emergency Room today?
Patient: Oh you know...
Me: ...is that a question? Because I asked you first...
Patient: Well you know, I just be like not like feelin right, you know. Like I be hot and cold and hot and cold and like my temperature be like all up and down and up and down n shi*.
Me: Mmmk
Patient: You know like I dunno if I be dehydrated or like you know if I be like stressed, you know. Like I be doin things and it aint right. You know like I'm stressed a lot and be like tired n shi*.
Me: K, so you have a fever and your thirsty, and shi*?
Patient: Yeah
Me: ...

What It's Come To

Rob agreed to start taking a daily vitamin if I bought them in gummy form. Realizing it's a new day and getting to take my gummy vitamin has come pretty close to my favorite part of the day. Of course, behind the rewarding stuff and stuff of being a stay-at-home-mom, etc.

My typical route home includes making a left-hand turn off of a busy street. There is a turning lane. We share this turning lane with people coming from the opposite direction. The people coming the other way almost ALWAYS hop into the turning lane like a half a mile away, leaving those of us who are trying to utilize the turning lane correctly, to risk our lives trying to wedge our way into the lane. If my street is literally RIGHT there, I get to be the one in the turning lane. ME. Not you. You have another 5 minutes before your turn. I will kill a man.

I was at the grocery store and my cashier looked just like an Avatar from the game, Just Dance. I told him so. After a few misguided comments I realized it sounded like I was making a serious play at him. So after my face was red enough that I could feel it in my ears, I basically sprinted towards the door. The good thing is, Robbie was with me, just to add a little extra weird.

I went to Whole Foods to pick up sushi for Valentine's day. You don't have to cook it...see where I'm going with this? Anyway, after searching for the sushi stand I asked an employee if they even carried Sushi. I was met with the judging eyes of a disgusted-hipster-passerby who just happened to overhear my question and after looking up from his book, while pushing his cart (seriously), he pointed me in the right direction (without meeting my eyes). Whatever, Whole Foods. It's not like I wasn't wearing Terra Cotta colored ankle skinnies and a chambray button up, I totally was. What more do you want from me? How can I make you feel like I belong? Is it because I forget my reusable grocery bag? Sike, I don't even own one, jokes on you!

I bought a Papyrus card for Rob. They always include a little gold envelope seal with every card. There was no gold seal. What kind of cheap piece of... Banned.

I'm anti Anti-Valentine's day people. You guys suck. "I just hate that I have to be told what day to love my loved ones." Whatever. Shut up. Just buy some flowers, eat some chocolate and don't be the worst." Valentine's day is a manufactured blah blah blah." You hate love, and you hate America. 

I've never seen Rob more excited to meet/talk to anyone than he was to meet a blogger from Grantland.com this past weekend. He saw him on the street and literally hung his head out the window and called out his name. We met him later that night at a restaurant. As you see, it was me that ended up taking a picture with him.

My most recent theory...

Facts:
-Robbie puked from 2 months old-a few weeks ago, 20+ times a day (not spit-up, vomit, bad).
-He's been in the 14 pound range for 6 weeks now and has stayed the same weight for 3 weeks.
-I've tried medication, bottles, formula, feeding times, flavoring, EVERYTHING
-When anything food related touches his mouth he freaks out
-He hates drinking formula but he loves drinking water, and ice. Take away his ice, and he loses his mind
-He wakes up after 12 hours and could take or leave his bottle. He has no interest and no appetite.
-Despite all of this he is extraordinarily pleasant
Theory-
My mom is visiting and she started researching appetite enhancers (specfically the medication, Megace, which you give to anorexic patients, cancer patients or any other patient who is not inclined to eat). Upon researching this we have stumbled upon Zinc deficiency and other vitamin and mineral deficiencies causing appetite suppression. Zinc, specifically, can cause appetite suppression and cause things to taste bitter. Iron deficiencies can cause a condition called PICA where the patient will crave non-nutritive things and often have perpetual craving to eat ice. Vitamin D deficiencies cause malabsorption and poor growth. Patients with renal issues are typically deficient in these areas. I also had a friend who spoke with a pediatrician who explained how common these issues are and how he was surprised that none of these ideas had been explored previously.
Plan-
We've started with blood work to test for these deficiencies and hope that what we will find is that it is in fact the cause for his issues. The solution is simple, and would include supplementing these vitamins and minerals daily.
To be frank, it seems pretty lame that nobody has come up with this before (any of his 3 doctors) when it seems to be such a common side effect with children in his condition. Regardless, we are hoping for the best and that we have hit on something promising. Fingers crossed.


Also, on his free time he enjoys chopping and gathering firewood.

Let's Talk About Some Things...

When I was single Rob used to show up at my apartment, walk in without knocking, sit down on my couch and say, "Let's talk about some things..." After he listed off his various topics and got a sufficient response he usually left. He really took the idea of being "aloof" to a whole other level, and I was apparently super into it.

But really, let's talk about some things:
-Sometimes when I give Robbie a bath I worry that he ingests as much glitter as I find on his person.
-I bought some fancy crackers today and they tasted just like Chicken in a Biskit. I was not disappointed.
-When I work my one shift out of the month I'm in an obnoxiously good mood the whole time. People are like, "Hey Kasey, you're patient doesn't look too good." I'm like, "Sweet, lemme just dannnnce my way back in there then. You're right, there is probably a situation here, cha, cha, cha!"
-If your dog poops in my yard, and then I almost hit it, I feel like an eye for and eye, yeah? That's still a thing, right? Does that apply here? I think it does.
-When my baby pukes in public (he usually reserves it for the grocery store) I pretend that I have no idea why he would be doing that and act completely mortified because he definitely doesn't do that at least 20 times every day. If I stay calm I feel like I'm saying, "Yeah, he puked. So? This is socially acceptable. I knew there was a 90% chance this would happen and I came into the produce section anyway!"
-Fake poinsettias>real poinsettias. Poinsettias are just a high-maintenance and underachieving flower/plant/leaf/whatever. They are seriously impossible to keep alive. Especially if you don't water them, or put them in sunlight. Worst. Plant. Ever. Why can't they ever just be like the cactus and learn to be a little bit more self sufficient?
-Holiday drivers suck. It's Christmas, you buttholes. Give a courtesy wave at the very least after you cut me off.

Call me old fashioned...

I like being a stay-at-home-mom.
I like doing girl things.
I don't ever think, "Man, I wish I was a guy."
I'm okay with being the one who cleans and does the laundry.
I believe in equality within a marriage but that is not to say we have to split all responsibilities down the middle; we have separate responsibilities and that's fine.
If someone makes a remark about my looks I feel like, "Sweet, thanks for noticing."
I believe that "feminism" began as a noble cause to establish equal rights and has now turned into, "we should all be interchangeable beings regardless of gender."
God created us.
There has to be a happy medium between embracing our genders and being treated with equal respect.
Double standards exist. They always will. I'm not offended when a guy wants to open the door for me. Does he expect the same from me? No. Is he going to start a protest about it? Probably not.
Whatevs. Sometimes I just feel like I'm being represented by women who hate being women, and I'm out on that.

Serious blog concluded.