CH2O+O2--->H2O+CO2+CO+C+N2

I've finally realized whats different about my family...The men in my family have super human strength.

Scene: Sitting in the living room with my mom watching Oxygen (I always think she'll leave him and she never does) when my mom says, do you smell that? Did someone light a candle she asks- An explosion of olfactory signals told me a candle was probably not the culprit. I run out the front door to look for my brother and dad who had been working in the garage. No luck. I run to the back yard and look through the woods and low and behold...an enormous field fire. Crap.

After my mother finally saunters to the back door to let me in I throw on a really adorable pair of White Mountain khaki boots (with the furr) and took off into the woods. Did I mention before I began my pursuit I noticed what looked like two male silhouettes in the distance? Need I say more? I get to the top of the hill and my dad and brother are literally beating the crap out of the fire. And when I say literally, I mean they both had shovels in their hands running around a circle of fire beating it to the ground. They look up.

"There was a fire. But uh. We put it out."

"With shovels?!?!?!"

"Yeah."

I mean What?!?! Seriously? I was waiting for my other brother to show up and transform into a fire hose just to show those embers who's boss. Somewhere along the line my mom took the guys out and dipped them in some sweet river (we'll call it Styx) and now THEY OWN FIRES.

CH2O and O2 never had a chance.