Tuesday, June 23, 2009


Invitations are out.


Saturday, June 20, 2009

Variola anyone?

So sweet.

Oh and, we're all going to die from an act of bio terrorism.

And it will be the Russians.

Monday, June 15, 2009

Ode to a Ferry

Well, aside from being one of the most amazing individuals I know, Ferry is more than that, she's probably one of the most amazing individuals YOU know...and she's my best friend.

Warning: This will probably get mushy, so if you don't like mushy, just don't read on

In all my history of best friends I don't think I've ever had someone more trustworthy or more loyal. I could literally be 100% wrong in an argument...and Ferry is on my side. How perfect is that? If I am mad, Ferry is mad, if I am happy, Ferry is happy. If I actually want rational advice (which isn't often) she is willing to give it, but most of the time her advice revolves around a genuine concern for what is best for me.

When we met three years ago (through my sister) I asked Kjersti...."Who is this girl, and what do we have in common with her again?" And although my first instinct (that we were/are POLAR opposites) was correct...somehow that works for us.

So now she is leaving me for eighteen months to serve a mission. Although I am soo proud and happy for her, I don't really know what to do without her. The good news is she is serving in the DC south mission, which means I can sneak out and see her when I'm home...but of course it won't be the same.

Shes leaving in TWO days to the land of the long skirts and early wake-up calls. Everyone will fall in love with her and she will be the best missionary ever.

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Stairmaster, people!

I judge people that take the elevator from the 9th floor to the 8th.

And yes, just like that. Bam. Judged.

Monday, June 8, 2009

Unhappy Birthday


Let's see I can...

drive, no wait already can do that
drink? no wait I don't do that either
smoke? had my chance for three years now
say i'm 21...there we go

So in other news, my blog is reaching you all the way from the hospital today where I have been assigned to sit for a patient. The patient is fifteen (we'll call him Invalid McLoverboy), he is visiting with us today because he tried to hurt himself, although I can't imagine why. Let me explain. He is not the only one checked in with us, no, no, at his bedside stands his ever-faithful girlfriend (also 15, and we'll call her Steamy McAdolescentlips). Can you see where this is going? Oh and I almost forgot to include the mother, the chaperon, the reason kids get pregnant in their own bedrooms.

The door is closed, the blinds are drawn, and nothing stands between this young love but four bed rails, an IV pump, an arm cast, and an inconveniently low hospital bed. Oh and then me, sitting in the corner, with NOTHING between me and the juiciest, most horrifying make-out session in all the history of adolescent hospitalized romances (which I pray to all that is holy is one of few). Let's be honest, when magnetism almost surpasses the time that you saw the Jonas Brother's front row and the curly-haired one look your general direction (but you know he saw you).

This has been going on for THREE hours. The mom, or the "enabler", chats away on her cell phone, not even phased by this Mickey Mouse club meets Cinemax episode unfolding right here in this dark, very, very small hospital room. I want to yell, "What is going ON!? She is EATING his FACE like a HAMBURGER, or did you NOT NOTICE!?"

Sweet MERCY what did I do to deserve this on my BIRTHDAY?!
Don't believe me?
I recorded a sound clip. BELIEVE THAT

Sunday, June 7, 2009

A prolonged period of excessively hot weather accompanied by high humidity

Being stuck in traffic in Texas is like being stranded out in the desert. "Oh hey, it looks like 20 cars up its starting to move...no, no, those are just the heat waves and this is delirium. Perfect. I bet that means the clowns handing out free ice cream weren't real either."

Wednesday, June 3, 2009


Artificial crab meat really isn't that bad. Obviously I don't prefer it but as I am so far away from my MD blue crab it'll have to do. 

I got these today (the white ones). And these. Happy almost birthday Me!

I'm turning 21! So that means...I'll basically be doing the same things I am doing now...except Rob can take me places with all his grown-up friends. Ha! Kind of weird, but the hilarity makes it worth saying. Actually a couple of coworkers are taking me out so they can get trashed and I can drive them home, woo party!

Oh and Rob bought me a beautiful linen dress for my birthday. I'm not sure how many women can say they trust their husband (almost) to pick out clothes for them, but Rob actually has great taste. Good work team.