Wednesday, April 2, 2014

Nope

Sometimes after I've taken a hiatus from blogging I feel like I should give an explanation but this time I'm wondering if everyone will just accept the following: I have a toddler and my life is no longer my own. Now that we've covered that, let's move on.

Some things I've learned about myself recently:
*I screen calls. I know its messed up but I do it, and I do it on the reg. Sorry in advance.

*I think binder clips are underutilized. After it's primary use, to keep toothpaste properly squeezed, you can also use them as a handy kitchen sponge dock, a cable organizer, and a money clip. I didn't even have to use Pinterest for that.

*I'd prefer to live on food that you might find in a 3rd grader's lunchbox. Dunkaroos, Little Debbies, those little packages of breadsticks and cheese (product) dip, Lunchables (preferably ham and cheese with the vanilla cookie), and most importantly, Gushers. Oh and I can get down with a good Uncrustable (grape jelly obvs) every now and then as well.

*I hate when people ask about any hobbies that I have. "Uhhhh...one time...I mean...I like...running." Lie. That's a lie. For some reason I immediately freeze and all I can think is, "I like to catch up on Hulu and buy novelty items at Target in the gift aisle."

*Being a mom makes me more approachable than I've ever cared to be. On more than one occasion a child at a playground (who does not belong to me) tries to hold my hand. Years of keeping people at a comfortable distance have all been thwarted by a child's inability to respond to carefully-crafted body mechanics. If you need a visual just think "Ron Swanson at a theme park."

*I met a waitress from the Ukraine who found it appalling that Americans eat cupcakes with their hands instead of with a fork. #america, that's why.

*My kid uses "nope" as a universal response to everything. I'm starting to think he's on to something. There are many times when it should probably be acceptable to just say, "nope" and walk away. For instance, when strangers want to share their birthing stories (yes, it happens. a lot) or when a patient won't disclose the location of the "oozing" wound they keep referring to. "Nope, cyaaaa."



4 comments:

Unknown said...

Oh my gosh Kasey, seriously... you are hilarious. I just died laughing through that whole thing. I tried to read it out loud to Tim, but he couldn't understand because my words were mutilated by mu laughter. Love this post. :o)

Thompson Family said...

And these are just a few of the reasons that I love you. And I'm with you on the eating like a kid.

kjersti said...

StillGotIt

Kate (DeBandi)Reid said...

I am completely on board with you on hobbies! There's always the stumping question when you're asked, if you should lie to make yourself seem more cultured and interesting thatn you really are or if you're honest and sound like a lame-o. I usually opt fot he half truth: "I enjoy reading, (highly intellectual things like celebrity memoirs, books made into movies, and of course anything written by Chelsea Handler or Jenny McCarthy), "I love movies, (which primarily means TV shows on Netflix that have gone off the air)and "I'm a big yoga person" (I do intend to do yoga quite often but you know what they say about the best intentions)!