Wednesday, February 27, 2008

Trouble in the Library

Scenario: (Imagine yourself there, and as myself, but don't get used to it...there is only one me)

Here I am in the library, minding my own manners on the computer. When I am studying I prefer things to be quiet...hence...I head to the library (funny how that works) anyways, there I am working on the foundation of my future, when homeboy comes over and sits his butt down next to me and starts typing. So as his typing continues, he starts to drop curse words all over the place, and I'm thinking, really...really? First and foremost, completely unnecessary to share your commentary aloud with everyone else in the library...nobody cares (namely, myself), and secondly, there are more efficient ways of getting the attention of the person next to you than speaking like an uneducated, obnoxious punk.

So my thoughts are, "okay, next time he says it, just say something. You wouldn't be doing anything wrong, HE's wrong" (I'm never wrong). Little did I know, things work a little differently at ACC Riverside campus (I guess the teachers that got caught drinking booze in the bathroom should have tipped me off. Even if it was free from the metro bus driver. Google it, its true)

-20 minutes later, 7853476895374 profanities later-

Enough is enough, right? WRONG. So after his last ridiculous conglomeration of every obscenity he could think of, I look over and say, "Look, I'm sure whatever you are doing...I'm sure its very frustration, but would you be so kind as to curse yourself...in your head?" (Disclaimer: Although most of you are imagining me saying this with a considerable amount of attitude...the attitude was minimal! Seriously!) Anyways, the rest of the conversation went a little something like this:

Thug Masta Riverside*: Excuse me?

Me (or You if you're still playing me in the scenario): Well, do you mind?

Thug Masta Riverside: Yeah, well maybe I do! (Expressed with buckets full of attitude and breath that deserves the death sentence)

Me: Yeah...well MAYBE you shouldn't be in the LIBRARY!

And THEN, out of nowhere, Mr. Astigmatism (please, no offense to those of you who unfortunately suffer from vision impairment) from the circulation desk comes over....."uhhh, excuse me, uhh problem?"

Me: Actually, yes, I was just trying to....

Thug Masta Riverside: YEAH. THIS **&$@#%#$^ was just *@&%$@%^#&^$#& and I'm gunna do whatever I want!

At this point, I may or may not have called him something, and told him to go do something, but that information is really not pertinent to the story.

Bottom line is, they kicked ME out. ME. They asked me to leave and to not come back until the next day. Are you kidding me? Is there no justice in this world? He gets to surf eBay while I am sent to time-out? Give me a break Riverside-circulation-desk!

And there it is, I was officially kicked out of the Riverside Community College Library. If I've ever felt any sort of failure before, nothing is comparable to my walk of shame through the metal detectors, out those double doors (pepperspray in hand), past the wailing sirens of two cop cars, all the way to my Honda Civic (parked next to the 86 el camino: License plate: elhombre).

That's it. You can relinquish my persona from this scenario and go back to your uneventful lives at your Universities and careers.

*Names have been changed because Johnny Bad *** didn't seem appropriate, and my Dad reads this. Hey Dad!

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