Sadly, my hair-dresser for the past five years left with no warning and no forwarding contact information. I don't know how she could abandon me like that, but she did. I have been forced to go on a hair-cut strike for the past 9 months and obviously it had to come to an end. But I didn't know where to turn...what is a girl to do?! Anyway, I saw this deal for a mani, wax and haircut all for $40. So that's really cheap, and although left me a bit skeptical, its not like I have any money anyway, so I took a deep breath and snagged the offer.
After driving around for an additional 20 minutes trying to find the salon I was greeted with a, "Sorry you got lost! We forget to tell our new clients the directions on google are wrong." Nice.
The lady who was going to give me my hair-cut walked over and herded me to my chair, informing me that "at this salon we have a time limit of 30 minutes per haircut." Seriously? It takes 30 minutes to blow-dry my hair. I start to sweat and panic a little, all the while cursing my previous hair-dresser's name (we'll call her Jessica...because that was her name) in my head.
Everything is going well and we start the usual, "getting to know you" shpeal that often occurs at salons (you know: how long have you worked here? do you like it? are you from around here? blah blah blah). I notice a picture on her counter of a little girl which I was sure generated lots of welcome conversation, since she did frame it and put it there. So I ask, "is that your daughter?"
Here we go. The remainder of the conversation goes a little something like this (you can find my thoughts in the parenthesis):
"Yes, oh my gosh isn't she cute. She just turned two blah blah (its unbelievable how much i don't care) pictures with bluebonnets blah blah. You know its hard being my age (31...32?)I mean I'm 28 (whoops) and trying to find friends with kids. I went to this mommy-and-me class but everyone there was like HYPER-religious (uh-oh). I mean these people go to church for like THREE hours on Sunday (I think I know where she might be going with this). I mean, my husband works, its not like we can go to church on Sundays (obvs). And these WOMEN (can't believe those women)! Some of them have TWO and THREE children (stop it, this is blowing my mind). And I'm like what is that?! (good parenting?). Yeah, they don't even have jobs (blasphemy!), they just stay home all day. And I love my child but um, I NEED to work. I'm sorry (apology not accepted) but I DO NOT have time to go to Bible study, are you kidding me?! (no)"
You might be waiting for me to go on about how I gave her a little piece of my hyper-religious-mind, but I just sat quietly smiling, mostly feeling bad that her social-skills were so underdeveloped with the accompanying thoughts that it is too bad she is going to raise children/child thinking like that. I wished I had a pass-along card, you know, just to make things weird.
4 comments:
Brilliant story. Is there a lesson to be learned here? Don't go for the cheap haircut? Nah. It is more likely don't ask people about their kids.
Sweet. I can understand how she feels, though, about those crazy hyper-religious psychos with their three or four kids staying home all day. Who could possibly be that insane?
And I thought, "Way to make a stand, Edna" was the best closing line ever. Until I read the "pass-along card" line.
Amazing.
Stuff like that is my favorite!! Kinda like when people at work say, "I hate the Latter-Day Saint blood drives cause they won't let me drink caffeine in their building. I refuse to go to those drives!" And I just sit there wondering what in the world to say.
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